So this is why everyone doesn’t do this…

So this is why everyone doesn’t do this…

posted in: Highlights, Preparations | 0

Greg was really excited when we got this switch in the mail from China or wherever.  This is apparently good for the boat.  Eventually he will be able to post and explain this.  Mel will leave you hanging for now.

Mel is not on the planet anymore.  Well, that must be what people think.  Because she has completely dropped all of the myriad connections with people that she had when she worked while she concentrates on the next task at hand: GETTING OUT OF MINNESOTA BEFORE HURRICANE SEASON RAMPS UP.  She is now in “single Mom” mode as Greg is down in Florida working on the boat while she closes up shop up here.  By the way, three cheers to single Moms (and Greg, who I essentially made de facto single Dad since I worked all of the time!)  HOLY COW IT SUCKS!

All of this has made her realize a painful truth.  “Real Life,” the thing she craved so much because she thought she didn’t have it while she was working, is not the easy float down a river of which you have ultimate control.  No, in truth, Real Life is terribly frustrating and inefficient!  She left her job because compensating for systematic inefficiencies was exhausting.  Now she is stuck doing the same thing, but with no one to blame.  Aaargh!  OMG, I sound like a pirate!

Take the other day for instance.  Allie’s electric guitar wasn’t communicating with her amp.  No noise.  Simple problem, right?  So Mel drives 45 minutes up to the Cities because she bought “Pro Coverage” on the guitar as she had a bad feeling about it.  Yeah Mel’s instinct!  She is feeling victorious!  She walks into the Guitar Center, and the guitar is diagnosed with: Bad Jack.  She is instructed that she needs to call Pro Coverage to activate the coverage.  She calls from her car and learns that the manufacturer’s warranty still applies and the claim will have to go through them.  She is feeling less victorious.  She walks back in to the Guitar Center, reports the results of her phone call, and then watches the clever guitar guru unscrew two screws and remove a random wire floating around that fell in there during manufacturing that was causing a short.  Uh, she could have done that had she known.  She feels defeated.  She suddenly realizes that all of the phone calls were just to avoid a measly $25 service fee, which the guitar guru waved anyway as the whole situation was stupid.  That was 1.5 hours of her life!  Ugh!  She left having serious doubts about her ability to handle Caribbean customs officers who randomly were not available from 1-2:30 pm.  Well, this will be a learning adventure for all!

And finally, a quick synopsis of one of her typical days these days:

7:15 a.m. Wake up and get kids ready for school.

8 a.m. Watch kids get on bus because I got stuff to do and the bus is good for them!

8-10:30 a.m. Finish cleaning house so the realtor can show it.  Conclude cleaning by shoving everything in basement closet.  Text realtor, “Don’t let them look in the closets.”

10:30 a.m. Renew MN Driver’s License which will expire while in Colombia in order to obtain long-lasting international driver’s license through AAA.  Groan on the way there as she realizes she was having a “bad hair day.”

10:45 a.m. Print out Colombia pet passport for vet to fill out for cat.  Schedule vet appointment, where she plans to request prophylactic travel cat antibiotics and kitty NSAIDS.

11 a.m. Print out tests to determine level of Singapore math homeschooling each child will be in.  Try to remember to administer tests to children.  Wonder why Singapore is so good at math.

11:05- 11:10 a.m. Get excited about voyage.

11:10 -11:30 a.m. Worry about hurricanes.  Search online and learn that this year is an El Nino year.  Feel better, as this means less hurricanes in the Caribbean!  Feel worse as realize it could mean higher winds.  Check supply of meclizine in case we have to close reach.

12 p.m. Eat lunch while texting Greg about the design for extra cabinets for the boat.

12:20 p.m. Call estate sales people and learn: 1. I don’t go to Northfield even though my website says I do or, 2. I am booked out until July.

12:50 p.m.  Decide to do garage sale May 30-31 (ugh) BY MYSELF and look up how to announce on craigslist.  Consider hiring local teenagers, or donating entire household instead.  Write garage sale ad that includes the phrase: “Now YOU can reap the benefits of our Amazon Prime subscription!”

1-2 p.m. Vacuum out Prius so we can sell it.  Look at 11 -year-old Ford Escape, groan, and call detailing place so we can sell it.  Look up how to sell a car.

2-3:30 p.m. Fill out disclosure statement for house.  Text Greg 20 times with questions like, “Do we have a drain tile system?”  I really have no idea.

3:30 -8:30 p.m.  Drive children to Piano/Guitar/Dance/Baseball/Volleyball/Gymnastics or whatever, plan meal, shop for meal, cook meal, serve meal, do dishes, clean counter, do laundry, put kids to bed.

9:00 p.m.  Have a glass of wine and watch the latest “Tiny Homes” episode on HGTV.  Wonder, “Am I a freak?”

9:30-midnight  I honestly have no idea what I am doing at this point.  I think I am punding.

Midnight: Pass out.



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